/*
 * This theme styles the visual editor to resemble the theme style,
 * specifically font, colors, icons, and column width.
 */




/**
 * Dahlia Dowler functions and definitions
 *
 * @link https://developer.wordpress.org/themes/basics/theme-functions/
 *
 * @package Dahlia_Dowler
 */

if ( ! function_exists( 'dahlia_dowler_setup' ) ) :
	/**
	 * Sets up theme defaults and registers support for various WordPress features.
	 *
	 * Note that this function is hooked into the after_setup_theme hook, which
	 * runs before the init hook. The init hook is too late for some features, such
	 * as indicating support for post thumbnails.
	 */
	function dahlia_dowler_setup() {
		/*
		 * Make theme available for translation.
		 * Translations can be filed in the /languages/ directory.
		 * If you're building a theme based on Dahlia Dowler, use a find and replace
		 * to change 'dahlia-dowler' to the name of your theme in all the template files.
		 */
		load_theme_textdomain( 'dahlia-dowler', get_template_directory() . '/languages' );

		// Add default posts and comments RSS feed links to head.
		add_theme_support( 'automatic-feed-links' );

		/*
		 * Let WordPress manage the document title.
		 * By adding theme support, we declare that this theme does not use a
		 * hard-coded <title> tag in the document head, and expect WordPress to
		 * provide it for us.
		 */
		add_theme_support( 'title-tag' );

		/*
		 * Enable support for Post Thumbnails on posts and pages.
		 *
		 * @link https://developer.wordpress.org/themes/functionality/featured-images-post-thumbnails/
		 */
		add_theme_support( 'post-thumbnails' );

		// This theme uses wp_nav_menu() in one location.
		register_nav_menus( array(
			'mobile_menu' => esc_html__( 'Mobile menu', 'dahlia-dowler' ),
			'primary_left_menu' => esc_html__( 'Primary left menu', 'dahlia-dowler' ),
			'primary_right_menu' => esc_html__( 'Primary right menu', 'dahlia-dowler' ),			
			'footer_left_menu' => esc_html__( 'Footer left menu (Explore)', 'dahlia-dowler' ),
			'footer_centre_menu' => esc_html__( 'Footer centre menu (Sessions)', 'dahlia-dowler' ),
			'footer_right_menu' => esc_html__( 'Footer right menu (Company)', 'dahlia-dowler' ),
		) );

		/*
		 * Switch default core markup for search form, comment form, and comments
		 * to output valid HTML5.
		 */
		add_theme_support( 'html5', array(
			'search-form',
			'comment-form',
			'comment-list',
			'gallery',
			'caption',
		) );

		// Set up the WordPress core custom background feature.
		add_theme_support( 'custom-background', apply_filters( 'dahlia_dowler_custom_background_args', array(
			'default-color' => 'ffffff',
			'default-image' => '',
		) ) );

		// Add theme support for selective refresh for widgets.
		add_theme_support( 'customize-selective-refresh-widgets' );

		/**
		 * Add support for core custom logo.
		 *
		 * @link https://codex.wordpress.org/Theme_Logo
		 */
		add_theme_support( 'custom-logo', array(
			'height'      => 250,
			'width'       => 250,
			'flex-width'  => true,
			'flex-height' => true,
		) );
		
					
		/**
		 * Initialises the latest post shortcode 
		 * 
		 */
	
		function dahlia_dowler_register_shortcodes() {
	
			add_shortcode( 'dahlia-dowler', 'dahlia_dowler_do_shortcodes' );
	
		}
	
		/**
		 * Finds and replaces shortcodes to output the main plugin functionality: a latest posts shortcode.
		 * While this is used by WP's Shortcode API, one can use this on their own manually without do_shortcode().
		 * 
		 * Simply call the function which prints out the content. Optionally you can pass in an associative array
		 * instead of using shortcode attributes.
		 * 
		 * @param   array   $atts           Optional. Shortcode attributes are passed in as an associative array here, e.g:
		 *                                  $atts = array(
		 *                                      "title" => "Latest Posts"   // Optional string, defaults to Latest Posts.
		 *                                      "limit" => 3                // Optional int, defaults to 3 posts.
		 *                                  )
		 * @return  string  $posts_list     Returns the content generated by dahlia_dowler_get_posts() according to the passed in parameters.
		 * 
		 */
	
		function dahlia_dowler_do_shortcodes( $atts ) {
	
			// Get attributes from passed in array if they exist
	
			$limit = ! empty( $atts["limit"] ) ? $atts["limit"] : false;
			$title = ! empty( $atts["title"] ) ? $atts["title"] : false;
	
			// Get the posts and return them
	
			$posts_list = dahlia_dowler_get_posts( $title, $limit );
	
			return $posts_list;
	
		}
	
		dahlia_dowler_register_shortcodes();

		
		/**
		 * The latest posts list is generated here. The returned HTML is put together in PHP because of preference, and since the HTML
		 * generated here is relatively simple, we won't lose out on much of the benefits of HTML colour coding or hinting in your favourite editor.
		 * 
		 * @param   string  $title              Optional string to title the collection of posts, defaults to "Latest Posts".
		 * @param   int     $limit              Optional integer used to limit the number of posts returned, defaults to 3.
		 * @return  string  $posts              The posts are taken from the loop according to any parameters passed in and returned as an HTML string.
		 */

		function dahlia_dowler_get_posts( $title = false, $limit = false ) {

			// If a title was included, use it, or use Latest Posts. This could be stored in a default options function instead.

			$title = ! empty( $title ) ? $title : false;

			// If a number greater than 0 was included, use it, otherwise default to 3. This number could instead be stored in a default options function that can be used in place of user specified options retrieved from get_option()

			$limit = intval( $limit ) > 0 ? intval( $limit ) : 3;

			// Prepare input array for wp_get_recent_posts()

			$args = array( "numberposts" => $limit );

			// Get the posts as an array of objects

			$posts_array = wp_get_recent_posts( $args, "OBJECT" );

			// Start with the post container and the title, then we loop through each post adding markup to the $posts variable

			$posts = "<div class='dahlia-dowler-latest-posts-container flex-row flex-center-center full box-shadow'>";
			if ( $title ) $posts .= "<h5 class='dahlia-dowler-latest-posts-title'>" . $title . "</h5>";

			foreach ( $posts_array as $post ) {

				// Get the permalink for this post, or if for some reason it doesn't exist, the home url

				$permalink = get_permalink( $post ) ? get_permalink( $post ) : home_url();
				
				// Get the posts thumbnail image url and widths and heights if they exist, or use a placeholder from the web at 300x200 pixels which is the default WordPress medium image size

				$post_image   = ! empty( wp_get_attachment_image_src( get_post_thumbnail_id( $post ), "medium" ) ) ? wp_get_attachment_image_src( get_post_thumbnail_id( $post ), "medium" ) : false;
				$image        = ! empty( $post_image ) ? $post_image[0] : "https://via.placeholder.com/300x200";
				$image_width  = ! empty( $post_image ) ? $post_image[1] : 300;
				$image_height = ! empty( $post_image ) ? $post_image[2] : 200;

				// Then for each post object in the post array, we create a subcontainer with the class dahlia-dowler-single-post

				$posts .= "<a href='$permalink' class='dahlia-dowler-latest-posts-single-post' style='background-image:url($image);width:calc( 100% / $limit );'>";

				// Scrim, a dark element allowing text above it to be legible over any imagery underneath

				$posts .= "<div class='scrim flex-row flex-start-end padding'>";

				// We'll start with the title

				$posts .= "<h6>";

				// Now we want to manually truncate the title if it's longer than 50 characters. This is a great candidate for inclusion as a modifiable attribute, or as a settings field. Otherwise, we could do this via CSS or JavaScript, with either being able to easily truncate depending on the number of lines output. 

				$maximum_title_length = 50;

				// If the title length is longer than the maximum length, we truncate it from characters 0 to $maximum_title_length and add three ellipses to the end, otherwise we just use the given title.

				$short_title = strlen( $post->post_title ) > $maximum_title_length ? substr( $post->post_title, 0, $maximum_title_length ) . "..." : $post->post_title;

				// Enter the title and close its tag.

				$posts .= $short_title . "</h6>";

				// Close the content container tag

				$posts .= "</div>";

				// Close the anchor tag

				$posts .= "</a>";

			}

			// Close the widget tag and return the HTML string

			$posts .= "</div>";

			return $posts;

		}
			
	}
endif;
add_action( 'after_setup_theme', 'dahlia_dowler_setup' );

/**
 * Set the content width in pixels, based on the theme's design and stylesheet.
 *
 * Priority 0 to make it available to lower priority callbacks.
 *
 * @global int $content_width
 */
function dahlia_dowler_content_width() {
	// This variable is intended to be overruled from themes.
	// Open WPCS issue: {@link https://github.com/WordPress-Coding-Standards/WordPress-Coding-Standards/issues/1043}.
	// phpcs:ignore WordPress.NamingConventions.PrefixAllGlobals.NonPrefixedVariableFound
	$GLOBALS['content_width'] = apply_filters( 'dahlia_dowler_content_width', 640 );
}
add_action( 'after_setup_theme', 'dahlia_dowler_content_width', 0 );

/**
 * Register widget area.
 *
 * @link https://developer.wordpress.org/themes/functionality/sidebars/#registering-a-sidebar
 */
function dahlia_dowler_widgets_init() {
	register_sidebar( array(
		'name'          => esc_html__( 'Sidebar', 'dahlia-dowler' ),
		'id'            => 'sidebar-1',
		'description'   => esc_html__( 'Add widgets here.', 'dahlia-dowler' ),
		'before_widget' => '<section id="%1$s" class="widget %2$s">',
		'after_widget'  => '</section>',
		'before_title'  => '<h2 class="widget-title">',
		'after_title'   => '</h2>',
	) );
}
add_action( 'widgets_init', 'dahlia_dowler_widgets_init' );

/**
 * Enqueue scripts and styles.
 */
function dahlia_dowler_scripts() {
	wp_enqueue_style( 'dahlia-dowler-style', get_stylesheet_uri() );

	//wp_enqueue_script( 'dahlia-dowler-navigation', get_template_directory_uri() . '/js/navigation.js', array(), '20151215', true );

	wp_enqueue_script( 'dahlia-dowler-script', get_template_directory_uri() . '/js/script.js', array( 'jquery' ), '20151215', true );
	
	wp_enqueue_script( 'dahlia-dowler-skip-link-focus-fix', get_template_directory_uri() . '/js/skip-link-focus-fix.js', array(), '20151215', true );

	if ( is_singular() && comments_open() && get_option( 'thread_comments' ) ) {
		wp_enqueue_script( 'comment-reply' );
	}
}
add_action( 'wp_enqueue_scripts', 'dahlia_dowler_scripts' );

/**
 * Include Advanced Custom Fields (ACF)
 */

require get_template_directory() . '/inc/class-acf.php';

/**
 * Implement the Custom Header feature.
 */
require get_template_directory() . '/inc/custom-header.php';

/**
 * Custom template tags for this theme.
 */
require get_template_directory() . '/inc/template-tags.php';

/**
 * Functions which enhance the theme by hooking into WordPress.
 */
require get_template_directory() . '/inc/template-functions.php';

/**
 * Customizer additions.
 */
require get_template_directory() . '/inc/customizer.php';

/**
 * Load Jetpack compatibility file.
 */
if ( defined( 'JETPACK__VERSION' ) ) {
	require get_template_directory() . '/inc/jetpack.php';
}

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			<header class="page-header">
				<div class="title curveb flex-column flex-end-center z8"><div class="full text-center"><h1>Tag: <span>Belonging</span></h1></div></div>			</header><!-- .page-header -->

			

<article id="post-91" class="post-multiple card box-shadow full post-91 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-awareness category-nlp category-self-growth tag-acceptance tag-belong tag-belonging tag-community tag-nlp tag-no-expectations tag-non-judgement tag-self-acceptance tag-self-growth tag-thoughts tag-tribe">
	<header class="entry-header has-meta post-image" style='background-image:url(https://dahliadowler.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/tribe-starry-night-e1492453056830.jpg)'>
		<a href="https://dahliadowler.com/nlp/what-it-means-to-belong/" rel="bookmark" class="scrim padding flex-colum flex-start-end"><h2 class="entry-title">What it Means to Belong</h2></a>	</header><!-- .entry-header -->
	
	<div class="entry-content-multiple flex-row flex-height-stretch">
		<div class='post-preview padding'>		<h1 style="text-align: center;">What it Means to Belong</h1>
<p style="text-align: left;">Belonging is an innate human need. We all strive for that sense of belonging from the day we&#8217;re born. We first work hard to obtain our parents&#8217; and family&#8217;s acceptance so that we feel like we belong in our family. Then when we venture out into the world and go to nursery and school, we try to fit in and gain that sense of belonging with the outside world.</p>
<p>As teenagers, at that vital time in our lives, when we&#8217;re trying to make sense of everything and figure out who we are, we battle with that sense of belonging. Whether we work hard to be part of the &#8220;Popular clique&#8221; or whether we fight to be &#8220;different&#8221; because we don&#8217;t feel accepted for who we are, we constantly yearn and search for a place to belong.</p>
<p>Because of this we go through a variety of experiences including excluding others who &#8220;don&#8217;t fit in&#8221; or by wearing masks so we &#8220;do fit in&#8221; in hopes they don&#8217;t really see who we are and so we can be accepted as &#8220;one of them&#8221;.</p>
<p>Throughout my childhood I was bullied. My childhood wasn&#8217;t an easy one. The outside world rejected me for being who I was, which at the time was an extremely gullible and naive kid who wanted to see the best in everyone. I was an easy target, especially for kids who had it rough at home. Soon I became the tool which other kids used in order to feel included, that they belonged. As long as they bullied me too they were &#8220;safe&#8221; from the same treatment.</p>
<p>I didn&#8217;t feel I belonged with kids my own age and this feeling carried well into my teens. I didn&#8217;t even feel like I belonged within my own country or the communities I should have technically been able to get along with.</p>
<p>Loneliness was my friend. A clingy companion who followed me everywhere. I had to make due with what I had, and all I had was myself for a very long time. I learned to entertain myself on my own, to find solace in literature and learning about topics that intrigued me. With time after numerous battles with depression and self harm, I accepted my &#8220;alone&#8221; time. It was no longer a curse but a blessing, a way to reset and refresh from the stresses of the outside world.</p>
<p>Through this experience I learned to stop caring about what others thought about me. At first I did it as a sign of rebellion, retaliation towards all those who decided I wasn&#8217;t &#8220;one of them&#8221;. Eventually it became my own form of empowerment. I wasn&#8217;t held back by the thought &#8220;what will people think?&#8221; I was free. I was sure with time I&#8217;ll find my &#8220;tribe&#8221; or others who would accept me despite or because of our differences.</p>
<p>It didn&#8217;t begin until I began learning what it meant to accept myself. Of course this didn&#8217;t happen instantly or easily. My journey for self acceptance, like anyone else&#8217;s, included a lot of trial and error and even a few set backs. But the core belief was there &#8220;it doesn&#8217;t matter what they think of me, what matters is that I&#8217;m okay with who I am.&#8221;</p>
<p>I met people with whom I had a lot in common. I learned to become my own person. I learned to be okay with who I was and with who I was becoming. Some people stayed throughout my journey, some came and went, and several joined in later in life. I started creating my own family, my own tribe.</p>
<p>Once I was able to practice self acceptance, I began on learning to accept others. I tried to search for the common ground, even with those I had once decided &#8220;unworthy&#8221; of my time, because they had once rejected or judged me.</p>
<p>I decided to level up my listening skills, at first as a way of connecting with others but eventually it became my doorway to acceptance and non judgement. I discovered that people, of all backgrounds, had their own struggles and pains. They weren&#8217;t all as shallow as they appeared to be, and even those who were, with some time and conversation they allowed themselves to open up when they found a safe space with me.</p>
<p>As the years went on loneliness rarely came to visit. Alone wasn&#8217;t a place for him to live anymore. This was made more possible when I learned to embrace a life without expectations. It&#8217;s true that with certain groups or people I didn&#8217;t always feel like I belonged but more often than not, it wasn&#8217;t because they weren&#8217;t inviting, but because I chose to block myself off from people knowing me. I had fallen into the trap of the &#8220;listener&#8221; and forgot how to be a &#8220;sharer&#8221;. I created my own bubble of unbelonging.</p>
<p>Over the past year it became apparent to me that belonging is a human creation. In fact another tool the Ego uses to make us feel superior or inferior. A method to separate us from the Whole. We&#8217;re essentially all one and all come from and will return to the same source &#8211; regardless of our religious or spiritual beliefs.</p>
<p>We&#8217;re made up of the same matter and our souls or spirits come from the same place. We&#8217;re all born from a woman&#8217;s womb (whether naturally, surrogate or otherwise). We have the same life cycles and have the same basic human needs. Although we may have differing opinions, beliefs, values or behaviours, we&#8217;re all deep down the same. We&#8217;re unique while simultaneously all one.</p>
<p>It was with the acceptance of this truth that I realised we create that sense of belonging. No one dictates that for us. If we believe we belong, we belong. We choose. We belong anywhere and everywhere.</p>
<p>Accept that all people are different but we all have common grounds. Accept that you&#8217;re good enough and that you have your place in the world. Accept that we belong to a Whole much greater than anything we can fathom. I belong, you belong, we all belong. Create that space, it&#8217;s waiting for you.</p>
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